LOVE— A pretext in a text for teenagers to have sex

Romantic love is a mental illness… But a gratifying and pleasurable one! —Calm down, retreat and hold your livid fire love-sick puppies … I am about to explain why… See.. .Love is parallel to an excruciating backache paralysis, it cant show on X-ray scanners but its still there!  As  a matter of fact let no…

Looking for a Wife? She’s somewhere looking for Wi-Fi

Whoever said technology will replace paper is some poor guy with a flourishing indigestion who has never  tried wiping their ass with an i-pad or an Android device… (Calm down Windows users… Your devices too cannot scoop that poop! .. albeit its Microsoft ).  Technology is here to stay just like weaves… We cant wish…

Christmas is a baby shower that still lives on

Once again we come to the holiday season… a deeply religious time that each of us observes their own way in merry making by going to the mall of their choice!  And the Mall issue might turn out grave in your thoughts when you reminisce the happenings in Kenya where the Westgate Mall was under…

Power to Read.. or power to Breed?

Now over the past few weeks my eyes have been served to a legion of scholars in their graduation gowns and it is with equal measure of enthusiasm that my Facebook timeline has been splashed with graduation regalia and the paraphernalia that comes with all that ballyhoo. This type of hype only leaves me nostalgic…

Dont Kill yourself for Likes… Dont like yourself for kills

If you follow me and I follow you back, just know at some point in that relationship i will spam your page with ‘LIKES’.  Like i just won a lottery and I’m just about to pay your dowry! Please don’t be offended or think I am thirsty dear Lass…I’m not a sperm donor I’m  just…

She can’t cook? She’s a Rookie, Go grab a Cookie!

Has the devil ever pulled your leg unawares resulting to a reflex where your lips scatter,  if only to utter and cough out the words “Can you Cook? ”  to a Lady who thinks cooking is Rocket science if not Organic chemistry? If your love for food is undisputed like mine… then i should believe…

You can Never BUY LOVE, But you still have to PAY for it

Am betting by now you(Lovestruck buddy) have met Betty the beauty, who you can volitionally  bet all your money on… Even further play her the violin just so she can dance to your tune? Or is it Beryl Bribe me first that you met at the mall — the same belle who’s  bride “price” you…

Behind every PRETTY GIRL there is a BOY wasting his TIME!

  Damn Damsel! …. Why do you have to be so alluringly  dead magnetic Fine! Can i walk you down the aisle?  On an island maybe…? Because honestly girl you give me a sporadic attack of goosebumps.. As if that isn’t enough mellow drama he might add…  Girl is your Mother a Rocket jet fighter—because when…

OF THEM THAT SAY MEN ARE DOGS… BUT ALL DOGS GO TO HEAVEN

” You men are all the same…”  (I’m  inclined to comprehend that the lady who invented that phrase was a Chinese who lost her boyfriend in a crowd! ) such are the sentiments you will get from a frustrated damsel in distress who just survived the intriguing intricacies of her playboy, rendering her the “SideChick“. She…

Was your School life this interesting.? (A letter from Jackson Biko)

Now Most of us have been “privileged” to attend boarding school at some point in their quest for that rather satiable experience that comes with being confined within the walls of academic imprisonment… — whose culmination  always discards the weetabix kid demeanor and transforms one into fully armoured hard-core brainiac erudite , if not ex-hiltler…

OPEN BOOKS NOT LEGS… BLOW MINDS NOT GUYS!

If you really want to hide your “Last seen”  on Whatsapp I’d suggest you hide it in a Book…. Thats the last place these thirsty, dryspell-stricken lotharios will check!  Where would they get the time to open up a book if they are busy chasing after skirts to book for a coitus session in their…

OF FOLKS THAT WORK ON THEIR SELFIES INSTEAD OF THEMSELVES

Now am sitting here thinking out loud as I fill my cup with more chamomile tea,  because I’m just about to pour out my sentiments just so you can have a drink… But first let me document the mood with a Selfie! Nice shot..!  But wait… i think that one conspicuously parades my acne-infested face……